<table border="0" bgcolor="#000000" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="3">
<tr>
<td width="100%">
<p>Crystal Ball</p>
<p>Please enter a yes/no question and it will respond</p>
<p>Warning: the crystal ball has a tendency to be sarcastic!</p>
<table width="40%" border="0">
<tr>
<td>
<form name="input1" method="post">
<input name="textfield" size=63>
</form>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<table width="8%" border="0">
<tr>
<td>
<form method="post">
<input type="button" name="button1" value="Ask Me!"
onClick="getAnswers()">
</form>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<script language="JavaScript">
//Crystal Ball Script - By Michael McDermott (mcdemf1@wfu.edu)
//http://www.wfu.edu/~mcdemf1
//Visit JavaScript Kit (http://javascriptkit.com) for script
function getAnswers() {
time = new Date()
randominteger = time.getSeconds()
if (document.input1.textfield.value == "") {
alert("You dummy! You didn't enter anything into the Crystal Ball!!!")
return
}
if (randominteger <= 3) answer="Did you really think so? Hahaha, I'm laughing now at your pitiful chances."
if ((randominteger >= 4) && (randominteger <= 6)) answer ="Yeah, it it's got a 65% chance of happening."
if ((randominteger >= 7) && (randominteger <= 9)) answer ="Oh come on! No way!"
if ((randominteger >= 10) && (randominteger <= 12)) answer ="As sure as I'm made of glass, this is likely to happen."
if ((randominteger >= 13) && (randominteger <= 15)) answer ="Why are you asking A CRYSTAL BALL? Do you really believe the answers?"
if ((randominteger >= 16) && (randominteger <= 18)) answer ="Give me a break, give me a break, break me off a piece of that NO!"
if ((randominteger >= 19) && (randominteger <= 21)) answer ="Good chances lie on the horizon."
if ((randominteger >= 22) && (randominteger <= 24)) answer ="Ask me again, I am restless and overworked."
if ((randominteger >= 25) && (randominteger <= 27)) answer ="Do you know how the Crystal Ball works? There's your answer."
if ((randominteger >= 28) && (randominteger <= 30)) answer ="As the sun is hot, your answer is YES."
if ((randominteger >= 31) && (randominteger <= 33)) answer ="Did you get drunk last weekend? There's your answer."
if ((randominteger >= 34) && (randominteger <= 36)) answer ="Forget about it"
if ((randominteger >= 37) && (randominteger <= 39)) answer ="Yeah, it could happen. 80% chance."
if ((randominteger >= 40) && (randominteger <= 42)) answer ="Hitler has a better chance of raising from the dead."
if ((randominteger >= 43) && (randominteger <= 45)) answer ="If you really think so, then it shall be."
if ((randominteger >= 46) && (randominteger <= 48)) answer ="Who said ambiguous answers were bad? Not me, so YES!"
if ((randominteger >= 49) && (randominteger <= 51)) answer ="You think I'm going to answer that after a day of hard work? Ask again later."
if ((randominteger >= 52) && (randominteger <= 54)) answer ="If you own a pet, yes. Otherwise, no."
if ((randominteger >= 55) && (randominteger <= 57)) answer ="The sun will rise in the east and set in the west. Thank you Captain Obvious. YES!"
if ((randominteger >= 58) && (randominteger <= 60)) answer ="I'm laughing hard, very hard. You'd better ask again."
var newWindow = window.open("","Results","width=300,height=300")
newWindow.document.write("<html><body bgcolor='#000000' text='#FFFFCC' link='#00FFFF' alink='#000066' vlink='#6666FF'>")
newWindow.document.write("<P align='center'>Your Question:</P><P></P>")
newWindow.document.write("<P align='center'>" + document.input1.textfield.value + "</P>")
newWindow.document.write("<P></P><P></P><P></P><P align='center'>The Great Crystal Ball Has Answered:</P><P></P>")
newWindow.document.write("")
newWindow.document.write("<P align='center'>" + answer + "</P>")
newWindow.document.write("<P></P><P></P><P align='center'><A HREF='javascript:window.close()'>Close Me</A></P>")
}
</script>
</td>
</tr>
</table>
<p align="center">This free script provided by<br />
<a href="http://javascriptkit.com">JavaScript
Kit</a></p>
Saturday, 26 July 2014
Friday, 25 July 2014
Pain Relief
Stop Blisters Hurting
You know when you're on a long bike ride or something and you get a really painful blister? Worry no more, my friends. Follow this list of instructions:
1. Find a dandelion and snap the stem.
2. Use the dandelion's 'milk' (the white stuff on the inside of the stem) and rub it on the blister.
3. Find some wild garlic and chew it to a pulp, before spreading it on the blister. (if there is none nearby, go to step 4.)
4. Find a decent sized leaf and wrap it round the blister.
5. continue your journey.
Welcome
I post the deepest and darkest secrets there are, as well as which toy store sells the cutest teddy bear (joke). I will reveal all the secrets, all the recipes, and all the interesting things you never knew before, so check back regularly.
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